What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Randomize
