R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
