she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
