I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
