Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Houston, we have a squirter
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Randomize
