how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
