It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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