I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
