they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Who wears a wallet chain?!
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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