it wasn't lemon gatorade
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
