I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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