Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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