piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
