he puts the penis in happiness.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
