She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
