i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
