I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
