I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
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