im drinking this country out of the recession.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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