What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
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