we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
