I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
