I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I didn't notice because vodka
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
