This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
