im having a threesome with these popsicles
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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