she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
