Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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