White coat. Heels.
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
