walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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