I like to think it a success when the cops are called
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
