Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Terrible idea I love it
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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