guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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