You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
home. puking in laundry basket.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Randomize
