i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
