I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize