You're a womanizer and a bitch.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
