Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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