nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize
