Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
