I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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