Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I think i peed on brittanys purse
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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