Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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