btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
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