he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
