yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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