the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
that is very illegal...i love you.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
