So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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