singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
