I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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