I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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